Texan Tales (& Tails) - by TinysMom

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wabbitmom12 wrote:
Cyrano was just one of those bunnies who is "larger than life". He had so much personality. Like Sabine says, how could you not look at him, and hope he'd make it?

I hope you're not beating yourself up about half-way convincing yourself that he'd live. You know, if you had just said, "well, he's just going to die", it would have been harder to give him all the love and normalcy that he had. At least, I would have had a hard time with that. I'd feel myself kind of pulling away, so I wouldn't get hurt when he did pass away.

But you didn't do that!Of course you wanted to believe he'd live. Love brings us so much hope. Cyrano knew he was so loved, and it gave him the will to be a "normal" bunny while he lived. It was a wonderful gift that you gave him!

I know you got hurt...when we love big, we can get hurt big. I guess that was the price of his extraordinary life. But just think about how much he impacted so many of us around the world!! WOW! That'sa lot of influence for a teeny, little scrawny-cute, 10 ounce bunny. We ALL were pulling for him.THANK YOU for giving him the permission and safety to be himself...I was blessed, and so were many, many others.
I want to start out by saying that I appreciate everyone's comments and they've meant so much to me.....but Karen - your words opened the floodgate today and allowed the tears to flow...tears I'd been trying to hold back because I questioned myself on so many things with Cyrano. As Ali has been aware - I've been going downward into a really bad spiral of depression since he died (even a bit before he died) - and today I just hid myself away in bed for a large portion of the day and didn't want to play with bunnies or do anything. My body was hurting which was part of the problem - BUT - my heart was broken. I had a hard time going in and playing with the bunnies and not being a bit upset that they were still here when he was gone.

Then I got up from bed - read your post - and the tears came. I think I cried for over an hour tonight - and I'm finally starting to feel a bit better.

Ali helped me too on the phone when she said, "I know you're hurting now and grieving...but if you hadn't of loved him and had hope and just let him die early on...you'd have missed out on him sneaking up on Mercury and biting him on the butt - or sneaking out of the rabbitry and acting like he was innocent."

As she shared those things - I realized she was right. I have so many memories of him - (partly because I recorded them here for y'all).

I think a part of him will always be with me when I see a runt and I'll probably always try to have hope - even though it hurts.

I love the saying, "It is better to have loved and lost...then to have never loved at all."

Finally - I have one last thing to share - but I don't have photos yet so I won't share it except to say I have a secret that I've been holding back for several days - partly because I was scared some would judge me. But it is killing me to hold it in....so once I get some pics...I'll share. All I can say - is what Ali always reminds me of, "Everything happens for a reason..".

But I will give a hint...

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I'm wiped out and probably won't explain it right - but here goes...

On January 1st, some of the "big girls" were having some playtime when Art went to water them.

He did not realize that Mercury was out...nor did he realize that Mercury followed him.

I realized about a minute after Art walked back into the living room and I asked him where Mercury was.

Meatloaf - a larger blue female (not sure if she is Bevereen or American or what) decided to have some "fun" since there was a buck around.

I haven't wanted to share because I didn't want to get flamed for having mixed breed babies....especially since the buck is a flemish giant.

But they are just so cute - it was killing me to not be able to share them.

So those who want to flame me...go ahead...flame away.

In the meantime - Mercury is never out when Art is watering the rabbits - or if he is - he is in my eyesight at all times.
 
What the heck!!!! Is sooooo irresponsible if you to NOT share the pictures :p.

I want to see pictures of Meatloaf now. What colors are the babies? Are they going to be big?! I already love that cute little light colored one in the picture!


 
undergunfire wrote:
What the heck!!!! Is sooooo irresponsible if you to NOT share the pictures :p.

I want to see pictures of Meatloaf now. What colors are the babies? Are they going to be big?! I already love that cute little light colored one in the picture!
I will get photos of Meatloaf later this week- my photo cards are full and I did good to get these photos.

I will share a couple of not so great photos of her (she bit me really hard earlier this week so I have to be careful with her).

We have one chinchilla like daddy (light grey), 3 chestnut and 2 that I thought were black but I'm thinking they might be sable as they are black and brown or something.

Their heads are AWESOME and while it was NOT a planned breeding - it showed me what Mercury can produce even with a non-flemish (in other words - I'm highly impressed with what he can give me).

I'll look for another memory card in a minute and see if I can get a couple more photos...but here is mama.

Meatloaf doesn't look it but I want to say she's about 7 or 8 pounds. I remember when I picked her up a few weeks ago and was thinking she was maybe 5 pounds - I put her on the scale and was shocked. She's built like a brick. Oh - and she appeared to have an easy time with the delivery and nursing the babies.

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Now this next part is hard to share...but when I put one of the babies on the scales the other day - at about 10 or 11 days old...it was 5.5 ounces (1 ounce shy of what Cyrano was before he finally started growing).

I think I did that the day after he died.

I think that is part of why I've been so depressed and kicking myself about Cyrano.
 
Meatloaf is beautiful :inlove:. Are you going to try to find homes for these little babies? How old are they now?

I've got baby animal fever sooooo badly! All I want to do lately is cuddly baby animals and there are none around!
 
undergunfire wrote:
Meatloaf is beautiful :inlove:. Are you going to try to find homes for these little babies? How old are they now?

I've got baby animal fever sooooo badly! All I want to do lately is cuddly baby animals and there are none around!
The babies are 13 days old right now. They will be rehomed locally (I'll screen people myself with an ad on the Walmart pet department bulletin board). (My other flemish will be most likely going to people at rabbit shows although I would consider a local home for some of them IF I felt they were good homes).

Their eyes have opened in the last day or two.

I'm uploading photos to photobucket right now - here is one of them...

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I haven't even checked them yet to see who are girls and boys...

I don't know if you remember Jenny from when you were here - she was Puck's "true love". Meatloaf is basically a slightly smaller blue version.


 
EEEP! BAAAYYBEEES!!! They are so adorable! I count 7...is that right? Meatloaf is beautiful, too. I have a feeling those little mixies are going to be very good looking :)

P.S. (edited to add): I am SO jealous!! Unless Sweetie pops out some kits in the next 3 days, we will have another unsuccessful breeding! Argh! I want some babies to cuddle and kiss!!
 
wabbitmom12 wrote:
EEEP! BAAAYYBEEES!!! They are so adorable! I count 7...is that right? Meatloaf is beautiful, too. I have a feeling those little mixies are going to be very good looking :)

P.S. (edited to add): I am SO jealous!! Unless Sweetie pops out some kits in the next 3 days, we will have another unsuccessful breeding! Argh! I want some babies to cuddle and kiss!!

Come here when Nyx has hers ... in um....we hope....23 days or so? (Ooops...I wasn't going to share that - but oh well. Y'all can pray that we have two healthy pregnancies here...).

Here are a few more photos of the SIX babies....

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Jenny was one of the bunnies that I really loved, remember? She reminded me of my rabbit that I had as a kid who lived to be 9 years old.

I can't wait to see more pictures of the babies! At the same time...I don't want to because I get attached to all of your babies.

ETA:....just saw those pictures! I LOOOOVE the dark greyish ones :inlove:.



 
Final images for tonight as I HAVE to go to bed.

Thanks you two for not flaming me....I feel so bad this happened but as I said- Meatloaf is just fine.

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Amy - the light grey baby and one of the darker grey/black babies are my favorites. One of the dark ones looks almost like a pug in the face - I need to try to capture that look. The color is most impressive - I have no idea what it is - but WOW.

I am hoping they will have the personality of a flemish giant without the huge size - because sometimes I think the mixed breed giants live longer (the vet told me that she felt Zeus could live longer than most flemish because he is smaller).
 
Oh wow Peg, you have had a crazy week! Thank you for sharing Cyrano with us even though you knew he probably wouldn't make it. I have struggled with depression on and off myself and it can be so difficult. Get out there and cherish the time with the other babies!

Meatloaf's babies are so sweet! Yes, some people will always flame but thank you for sharing them with us anyway. They look adorable and Meatloaf looks like a great mum. One or two accidents does not make you a BYB. We all know you will find great homes for those fluffballs and take great care of mama. You have some of the most spoiled bun around!
 
TinysMom wrote:
I am hoping they will have the personality of a flemish giant without the huge size - because sometimes I think the mixed breed giants live longer (the vet told me that she felt Zeus could live longer than most flemish because he is smaller).

That makes a lot of sense. Just like with dog breeds, the "mutts" usually have the strongest immune systems, etc. Pure breds have a limited gene pool, so it makes sense that they sometimes have problems that commonly occur within the breed.

This is my favorite pic of Meatloaf's litter:


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They are just so sweet. Btw, how old is Mama, and is this her first litter ever?
 
Karen - this is her first litter ever. I'd have to go back and look up when we got her from my old blog - she is a blue doe that I fell in love with at the feed store - then we wound up fostering her sisters when they became pregnant from being with their brothers too long in the cages. (We also wound up keeping her sisters because all three bonded).

I'm thinking she's no more than 15 months old if my memory serves me well - and probably closer to one year old or maybe a bit younger than that.

She's always pretty aggressive about wanting to breed - I've had her mount my foot before to show me she wanted a buck.
 
TinysMom wrote:
I love the saying, "It is better to have loved and lost...then to have never loved at all."

so true. after years of depression i've come to realise nothing happens without a reason - just might have to wait a bit to find out why:)

now i've finished crying all over the keyboard after view cyrano's last pics.

thank you for sharing your new arrivals, i love that pic of meatloaf on top of the babies' box:inlove:
 
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