Jokes!

Discussion in 'Let Your Hare Down' started by JadeIcing, Sep 12, 2007.

Help Support Rabbits Online by donating using the link above.
  1. Feb 12, 2018 #201

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Somebody stole my mood ring, and I'm not quite sure how I feel about that.
     
  2. Feb 13, 2018 #202

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Two guys are walking down the street when they come upon a dog sitting and licking his balls. One of them says: "Boy, I wish I could do that!" The other replies: "Perhaps you should pet him first."
     
  3. Feb 15, 2018 #203

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
     
  4. Feb 16, 2018 #204

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Why did the lion break up with his girlfriend? Because she was a cheetah! [​IMG]
     
  5. Feb 17, 2018 #205

    Nancy McClelland

    Nancy McClelland

    Nancy McClelland

    Larry Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    Messages:
    15,556
    Likes Received:
    862
    Location:
    Las Vegas, Nevada, USA
    What's the difference between Donald Trump and the Hinderberg? One is a flaming, Nazi gasbag and the other was just a dirigible.
     
  6. Feb 19, 2018 #206

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
     
  7. Feb 20, 2018 #207

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Refusing to go to the gym counts as resistance training, right?
     
  8. Feb 21, 2018 #208

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    I'm seriously thinking about re-marrying my ex-wife, but I'm pretty sure she'll figure out I'm just after my money.
     
  9. Feb 22, 2018 #209

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic
     
  10. Feb 22, 2018 #210

    Nancy McClelland

    Nancy McClelland

    Nancy McClelland

    Larry Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    Messages:
    15,556
    Likes Received:
    862
    Location:
    Las Vegas, Nevada, USA
    A Priest commented at a funeral,"We are gathered here today to pay homage to a good man. He was a kind man, a man everyone loved, and a man who treasured his family as much as his family treasured him." The widow suddenly leaned over and whispered to her grandson, "Go make sure that's your grandpa in the coffin."
     
  11. Feb 23, 2018 #211

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    So, a thought crossed your mind? That must have been a long and lonely journey.
     
  12. Feb 25, 2018 #212

    Nancy McClelland

    Nancy McClelland

    Nancy McClelland

    Larry Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2007
    Messages:
    15,556
    Likes Received:
    862
    Location:
    Las Vegas, Nevada, USA
    One young woman asked another, "how did you like the ballet?" "It was alright," the other replied, "but I don't understand all that toe-dancing. Why don't they just get taller people?"
     
  13. Feb 26, 2018 #213

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    A procrastinator's work is never done.
     
  14. Feb 27, 2018 #214

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
     
  15. Feb 27, 2018 #215

    Cookiemonster

    Cookiemonster

    Cookiemonster

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2018
    Messages:
    279
    Likes Received:
    63
    Location:
    Minnesota
    What do you call a cow jumping over the fence??

    Udder failure!!
     
  16. Feb 28, 2018 #216

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go.
     
  17. Mar 1, 2018 #217

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    Transitional age is when, during a hot day, you don't know what you want – ice cream or beer.
     
  18. Mar 2, 2018 #218

    Cookiemonster

    Cookiemonster

    Cookiemonster

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2018
    Messages:
    279
    Likes Received:
    63
    Location:
    Minnesota
    A rabbit goes into a shop and asks, “got any carrots?” The shop keeper says no and the rabbit leaves. The next day, the rabbit returns and asks, “got any carrots?” Once again the shop keeper says no and the rabbit leaves.

    This continues for a week. The next day when the rabbit enters and asks for carrots the shop keeper says, “no! And if you come in here asking for carrots I’m going to nail your ears to the wall.”

    The next day the rabbit comes in and asks, “got any nails?”

    “No,” says the shopkeeper.

    “Good,” says the rabbit. “Got any carrots…?”
     
    Nancy McClelland likes this.
  19. Mar 2, 2018 #219

    Cookiemonster

    Cookiemonster

    Cookiemonster

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2018
    Messages:
    279
    Likes Received:
    63
    Location:
    Minnesota
    What do you call 500 rabbits walking backwards??


    A receding hare line!!
     
    Nancy McClelland likes this.
  20. Mar 2, 2018 #220

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    DJSpanky

    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    24
    Location:
    Central, Virginia, USA
    My internet is so slow, it's just faster to drive to the Google headquarters and ask them in person.
     

Share This Page