I had a difficult time bonding just my two and almost gave up. This website
http://www.wheekwheekthump.com really helped me reevaluate what I was doing and inspired me to give it one last go.
I'd never heard of that site until you linked it... I've looked through pretty much all of it now, though! Excellent site with a lot of very good bunny info - the various bonding articles, in particular, shine new light on an old topic. While I've only repaired a rabbit bond (since my girls were raised together as babies), many of Sandra's "unconventional" bonding tactics are ones I'd discovered on my own while attempting to bond sugar gliders to each other or to myself (something I've done many times now).
I've linked to wheekwheekthump a number of times since you introduced me to it, and not just for bonding whatnot! The page on
poop that's linked to in one of the articles is, indeed, the best I've seen for helping people figure out what their bunny's poop is trying to tell them... and the page on
Dr. Dana Krempels is a great resource for anyone with a bunny whose health issues are stumping their regular vet.
I am also a firm believer that pets are just like children. They are going to have to go to the hospital and need as much care and attention as any other pet. Being able to afford the proper care is important and rabbits tend to be more on the pricey side, let's not forget time consuming (so i'm finding)....
Making the decision to bring a pet into your home should never be taken lightly and making sure you have the resources available to properly take care the pet for so many years very important. It's a commitment that should never be broken. I do understand everyone situation is different and situations change, but definitely stop to think first.
If everyone who was considering a pet shared your mindset, I imagine animal shelters would be nearly empty and that there would be far less of them. Sadly, the overabundance of unwanted pets has become an epidemic in our day and age because too many people don't view pets as a lifetime commitment and/or see them as "disposable".
The vast majority of animals who end up at shelters are there because of failure to spay/neuter or because someone wanted an easy way out. The pee-spraying ex-Easter bunny who was surrendered when simple neutering could have made his behavior "acceptable"... the destructive dog who misbehaved and was out-of-control because no one had even *attempted* to train it... the cat who was wantonly tossed outdoors even though she wasn't spayed and came home pregnant...
Granted, there are inevitably some people whose situation changes so drastically that they can hardly afford (or outright can't afford) to care for themselves/their human family and feel they're just not capable of providing their pet(s) with proper care and medical attention -
in these cases, it's completely understandable (and forgivable) that someone might turn their animal(s) over to a shelter because they do so out of concern for the animal rather than selfish reasons.
In my opinion, adopting a pet is like choosing to marry someone or to bring a child into this world - in any of those situations, you're supposed to be *committing* to that other life "until death do we part." Extenuating circumstances can happen, but they certainly shouldn't be the norm. Does a bunny
depend on you for things like food, shelter, attention, mental stimulation/toys and medical attention any less than a child? No. While raising a child is, of course, much more challenging and time consuming, the basic tenets are the same - both pets and kids need to be looked after and have their needs met. It baffles me that people who would NEVER dump a kid on the streets to fend for themselves sometimes do just that to a domesticated animal, despite it being a near-certain death sentence for the animal.
I would suggest that you take the lone male on a series of bunny dates in your area to find a FEMALE that works well with him.
It's worth noting that one of the
bonding articles on wheekwheekthump strives to debunk the myth that M/F bonds are best/easiest. I do think there are cases where opposite-sex bonds are easier - my female glider, Hurricane, outright HATES any other female that comes into the house on sight/smell. However, she did eventually come around with Tabitha to the point that they got along well and I'm hopeful she'll also open up to Abby so that I can eventually form a quad when I retire Lemmy and Abigail from breeding and have Lemmy neutered - I know from experience that her hatred towards other females CAN be overcome. Overall, I agree that gender is less important than personality.
I have two female bunnies who were raised together from the time that they were 7 & 8 weeks old (Nala is one week younger). While I couldn't have explained at the time what I was doing, I've come to realize in retrospect that I carefully, intuitively selected two very different rabbits. I didn't even know if I was going to be bringing home one or two bunnies, lol.
I really liked the uniqueness of lionheads, so I looked at the female lionheads first. I *instantly* pointed to Nala as the one I'd like to meet. In addition to being cute as could be, she seemed very ballsy, outgoing and adventurous. I honestly felt as though I was "commanded" to choose her... which isn't surprising now that I've realized that Nala often sends telepathic commands to Gaz, the cats and both of us humans, lol. After the breeder took her out for me to hold, I never even considered putting her back with her siblings - I was absolutely taking her home with me. I kept looking, though, both to be thorough and because I was very open to the idea of getting a pair. Not wanting to have to worry about "oops" babies or keeping my bunnies separate for the first few months, I stuck with looking at females.
When I looked at the Holland lop females, I already had Nala picked and was going for something "different" - not just in looks, but in personality as well. I picked out a shy little wallflower to hold. Both bunnies appealed to me because I saw aspects of myself in them, but I saw something very different in Gazzles than what I saw in Nala. The breeder held Nala for me; I held Gaz... she let me continue browsing for a bit longer, but I really wasn't looking so much as just admiring the cuteness. Something about the duality of the Nala/Gaz combination just seemed meant to be.
Their bond has been upset twice, the first time happening right after their spays (I actually had to separate them for most of the recovery period). Both times, the problem was eventually traced back to Gaz (seemingly arbitrarily) getting it in her head that she didn't want to be the submissive bunny any more and attempting to hump Nala... which didn't go over well with Nala, to say the least. Both times, working with them on neutral territory restored the bond.
Hurricane was a solo glider for a few months; I had planned for Lemmy and Tabitha's first joey to become her cage mate, assuming she continued to cope well with living alone. Unfortunately, at the start of May, she abruptly became very irritable and was aggressive towards me in a way I'd never seen before. There was no medical reason for the behavioral changes and I suspected she was acting out from loneliness, so I promptly set up an appointment to get a cage-mate for her. I really knew my girly, and I picked out a submissive (neutered) male who I believed would mesh well with her "alpha glider" personality.
I skipped the usual 30-day quarantine after the initial health check because Hobbes came from a reputable breeder I'd worked with twice before and I felt that the inherent risks of Hurricane's deteriorating mental health outweighed the potential benefits of quarantining. She and Hobbes took to each other so instantaneously that they moved in together (into HER cage, no less) on day ONE... circumventing an intro/bonding process that normally takes a month or more.
Having dealt with M/M (one neutered/one not; unlike bunnies, that's considered safe as long as only one male is intact), F/F and M/F (with both neutered and unneutered males) glider interactions, I've found that personality plays far more of a role than gender... I see no reason why bunnies would be any different.
