My World, my Soul, my Flash

[Marietta]

Don't be so hard on yourself. Some things are just meant to be, somehow, for some reason, no matter if we cannot understand it. And since you have such a sensitive soul, I'm sure there are people around you who love and respect you.

Marietta

 

[Flashy]

I really don't have people. There is one person on this forum that tolerates me, my parents tolerate me, but don't really like me. My rabbits are my only friends. Flash was the first ever being in this world who made me feel loved, who realised I was loveable, my first real friend who wanted me for me, and I killed him. I'm not meant to have friends. I'm nasty and evil and don't deserve them. I miss him so much. It's been two years I'm so pathetic. I lost more than a bun that day. I lost my soul, my world, my best and first ever friend, I lost my future and hope.

 

[Flashy]

Two years ago to the minute I was holding your cold hard body.

You'd gone. I tried to wake you, it didn't work, I didn't try hard enough.

I got dad to put your plaque in today. One year late, but now you have the marker you deserve. I gave you a Friend bear, because you were my friend, and I lit a candle for you there too. It looks nice.

Tomorrow is supposed to be my birthday bud. I'm scared. My grandparents never listen to anyone. I don't want my birthday. I don't want to acknolwedge it, I don't want to remember. I'm going to be forced to, and I don't want to. It's not my birthday, it is the anniversary of when you were buried. I don't want to acknowlegde it, why are they forcing me to?

 

[polly]

I don't tolerate you I love you you are my friend and i am always here for you through thick and thin through the good times and teh bad times.

Sending the biggest hugs your way and hoping that Dido and Flashy are up there looking down at us and realising that if only one thing good has come out of what happened to them it is that it has given us each other as friends. :hug:



To Flashy You were a wonderful friend to Tracy and i can't thankyou enough for keeping her safe and giving me a chance to meet her on here. I hope you have met my cinabun and you are friends.

 

[Flashy]

:kiss::hugsquish::hug1:kiss1:

 

[Flashy]

Hello my lovely.

I saw you be buried again today, I hate that, I could picture mum and dad there, it was awful.

I tried to draw your son near, but he doesn't want to know me. He hates me, like everyone else. Maybe that's why it's hitting me so hard this year because I'm so deeply alone, but I was never alone with you. I hate the fact they hate me. I give them everything and they still hate me. Sometimes I wish they were gone, then it wouldn't hurt that they hated me, I wouldn't even know if they did or not. I want Sky to be close again, for us to be friends, but since his neuter we aren't. He has some days when I am apparently tolerable, but other than that, he hates me. I miss him greatly, even though he is here.

People have generally behaved today, although apparently no one can stick to the no cards, no prezzies, no mention thing. I prefer the pressure off. I've never liked my birthday. I hope next year everyone gets the hint and my birthday isn't mentioned. Maybe I should force myself to celebrate it on the day I was due. That was the 10th Dec, so that's far enough away. I don't know, but for some reason people can't contain themselves. I think they just enjoy ignoring what I say.

I hope you like what I did to your grave. I'll put some pictures up later of you and your cute face.

Always yours.

X

 

[Flashy]

My lovely, I needed you last night, so much. I hope you know all the things racing through my head. I really tried for you, I clutched at Sky and didn't move. I held on tight until all I could do was put him away and lie spaced out. You know why I say I have let you down, you know how much you gave me and I can't even be there for you now. I'm so deeply sorry mate. I truly am.

I also promsied you pictures, remember?

Here they are my beautiful.




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Look how small you were. That was our first day together. I felt so special and lucky that day. It was a great day.



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The original tall gene. Your family have that too, they always remind me of you when they do it.



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Look at your sleeping so calmly. I love this pic



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Remember you used to crawl under my computer table and cause chaos?



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Look how proud you look at being able to get on my bed. That made me laugh, the first time, do you remember? You were watching me unpack and wanted to see what I wasdoing, so you lept up and you 'helped' me unpack.



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[align=left]Do you remember how I used to play with you while on my bed? You got really confused.[/align]


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[align=left]How cute was this, claiming that wooden spoon.[/align]


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[align=left]That was your favourite place in my house, so you remember, next to the mirror. It was just behind me, and you could see everything, incluiding another bunny.[/align]


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[align=left]You're with this bunny friend until eternity aren't you. He's buried with you. You played with him loads. He will always, always be with you, as will I be, in the form of your favourite jacket of mine, and my soul.[/align]


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[align=left]This was your first and only Christmas. You got a wonderful hutch that day, but never got to use it. The next photos are from after you were attacked. I hate those, you have the marks all over you. There is one beautiful one, but when fumbling my new camera, I deleted it. I miss that pic, it was the last time you looked like you.[/align]


[align=left]Next I'll show you your beautiful descendents, but right now my new laptop is screwy so I can't.[/align]

 

[Flashy]

Thank you for yesterday Tubs. One year since you left, and you gave me the gift to help other bunnies. Thank you. x

 

[angoragrl]

I don't know what to say other then that I am so sorry for your loss.

 

[Flashy]

Hi Bud.

Is Moon there, I need you to pass this on please.

I've been thinking about you a lot recently. I feel terribly, terribly guilty for how we treated you. No, we did not intentionally treat you badly, but ignorance meant you suffered.

You had a dodgy gut, we knew that, and you got fat. When you got fat you were on minimal feed, mum said you must be stuffing hay, and to stop giving it to you. So, because I was too stupid to question, we stopped giving you hay. You got it once or twice a week as a treat. No wonder you loved it so much.

We even told the vet that we had and they didn't say anything (you know, the vets guilty of killing you).

You had minimal food (crappy food by all accounts, but I didn't know that at the time), and no hay. How you managed on that, stayed happy, lively and interested, as well as not in stasis, for months, I have no idea. Had you lasted another month more, I would have joined here, I would have revolutionised the way you lived, I would have got you healthy and thin, and done it the PROPER way.

Moon, I'm so sorry sweetie, I love you so much, and I wish, with everything I had that a, I had learnt more, and earlier, and b, I had found this forum earlier, for many reasons associated with both you and the other lost buns.

You had so much, run of the house, love and company, toys, and yet we neglected your nutritional needs through ignorance.

I have learnt though my lovely. I know how to look after rabbits properly now, I will never EVER do that again. I know how important hay is now, and I'm so deeply sorry that I didn't know that when you were about.

Infact, all of you, I'm so sorry for the things I did wrong. I'm trying to put them right with the crew I have here, if that means rehoming, which I'm thinking it might, then that's best for them. I love you all, Boof, I miss you sweetie, so does Sky. 1 year too long, again, something the vets missed, something I didn't realise was a potential indication of a problem.

I let you all down, very badly, but I'm trying to do the right thing now. If your rellies do go elsewhere, find them good homes. PROMISE me that, especially you Flash, they are here because of you, if it comes to it, find them the BEST homes!.

Moon sweetie, please accept my eternal apologies, and know I will never stop trying to make it ok. I'm sorry.

*Much hugs and snuggled to you all*

 

[Flashy]

* * * *[align=center] [/align]
[align=center]My dearest boy.[/align]
[align=center]Soon would have been your third birthday. I know its not today, but you know why I'm posting it today, 3rd of the 3rd. It's really hard to think that three years ago my best ever friend was about to be brought into the world. I just wish you'd stayed a bit longer. Well, ok, a lot longer.[/align]
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[align=center]I will be thinking of you. Please guide me the best way you can, the way that you know I should go. It will be one of two ways, do what you think if best.[/align]
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[align=center]Moomin, it's nearly a year. Three days after your daddy's third birthday will be the first anniversary of your death.[/align]
[align=center]I'm so deeply sorry. You know why, I've said it many times.[/align]
[align=center]I miss my Curly Whirly Girlie very much. I miss your cuddles and snuggles, I miss your feisty phwap, I miss your schmile, I miss your quirky ways. I miss you. [/align]
[align=center]I will forever regret everything, both from the day you died, the day before, and the fact of the accidental neglect you suffered. I wish with all my heart I had used a different vet, because none of that would have happened otherwise. Please just have my heartfelt apologies.[/align]
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[align=center]I ask the same of you as I do of Flash. Please guide me. Guide me together, to the right outcome. I'm so lost I have no idea what is best anymore. Your guidance will set me right.[/align]
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[align=center]To both of you, Flash, your daughter-in-law and your grand-daughter, and Moon, your sister-in-law and your niece need your prayers. Don't let them in. In you have to, treat them well, they are terrific girlies. They need all the vibes and wishes you can give them. [/align]
[align=center]I will be thinking of you both on your days. I will do the best I can. I'll try to acknowledge them.[/align]
[align=center]I love you both. I cherish you both everyday. Everyday I see more of you in your rellies. Moon, Sunny is becoming feisty, Flash, Angel is becoming a whirling hurricane that is showing your character so deeply.[/align]
[align=center]I love you both.[/align]
[align=center]x[/align]

 

[Flashy]

im sorry guys. im fed up, i mfed up of being mocke3d and hatefd of peope mocking me of people slagging me off, of people editing my posts. im sorry flash, im sorry moon, boof, and anyone else mentioned on this thread. ill find somewhere else to talk about you. im deeply sorry my beauyties. you bettetr guide me the right way.

 

[Bo B Bunny]

Whoa flashy! No one is mocking you or editing for no reason. Youseriously don't want that stuff on Flash's thread do you?

If someone is harassing you - then tell a mod or admin and let us handle it if we can.

 

[BlueCamasRabbitry]

Flashy, I just read this entire post...and I couldn't stop crying....you write so beautiful about Flash and he seemed like the world to you and he obviously was. Just reading your post made me cry and think about when I lose my Magic....i'll be so depressed and sad forever.

I'm so sorry you lost Flash. :rainbow:Binky Free Flash.

<3 Emily

 

[Flashy]

i dont cvrea whgats on this threafd. its not flash's thread anymore, its not az place i feel goosd, nor can wreite. whatever i wrtite seemas toi get edited out. its not as if writing makes a differwecen anyway, hes not going to now zanything abiutit, hes not going to understand because hes not here, hes dead and rotting int he ground. thizs thead was a patehtic attemtp for me to try and help myselkf feel better. which was stupid. so im not going to write it it anymore, noit t flasdhm moon, no one becsausdt nothing matters anymore. this thread can cecome whatever because i just dont care anyumore.

 

[Flashy]

I love you, and I always will.

4 years too far apart.

You should still be here, but look at what is happening in honour of your memory. Look at all these bunnies that have found homes because I used to have you.

Look at Flash's Place Buns. Think what Flash's Place will become in the future.

Thank you my sweet.

 

[MILU]

Flash is in my thoughts, he hasn't been forgotten!

His story is full of emotion: first laughters, then tears...
Many things remind me of my bunnies that passed... and the unconditional love we had for each other, and the feeling I could have done more... and a bunny who left after being told "you can do what you have to, and go where you have to" - after these words my MILU left me.

I understand how that feels.

Each bunny is unique, but yes, I understand - with tears in my eyes - how much you wish to see your dear Flash again!! If it helps at all, I believe we'll meet our beloved bunnies again. It might take time - the right time for us to do what we have to do here in this world, and then we'll meet them - all at the right time...

I just wanna say that Flash is a very special bunny and that he wouldn't want to see you sad...

Sending good vibes to him and to you (and all the others!)
:rip::cry2:cry4::cry1::bawl::rainbow:urplepansy::nerves1:bunnyangel::bunnieskiss