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bunnylover78642

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 18, 2005
Messages
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Location
Hutto, Texas, USA
I still have my problems:?... My dad said if I moved with him he would buy me a rabbitry... And I would be able to have kits and breed my hollands and mini rexes!! But, if I own a rabbitry I wouldn't be able to spend as much time with each rabbit as I do now (though I would have more time at home) Plus, I wouldn't be able to go riding (horses) in Arizona like I am going to be doing when we move. I have till July to think about it!!:(



Heres the whole thing; I am moving to Hutto in March (28th). When we move I will be living in a community with a very small yard but a new house, school, ext. And my mom will let me start riding lessons again because there is a riding center down the road!! I wouldn't be able to breed anymore but I still would be able to show Leo and have a "playground" for Leo and Luke (see "TOYS").

In the summer I am going to my Dad's house. I always go every summer but this summer he wants me to move down there with him and stay. He has a larger yard, a new house, school, ext. He also said that he would buy me all the stuff I would need to start a rabbitry and I could breed hollands and mini rexes. I could also take my animals that I have now. The only thing is is that I wouldnt be riding anymore and I would be leaving behind my mom.

Now I love my Mom and I love my Dad but this is a huge decision for a girl who is going to be only 15. I have lived with my Mom my whole life and I think it would be fair to give my dad a chance but I am scared about what could be the outcome. I just am so confused and afraid and worried and tired of this!! Could someone please just tell me WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!!:sad::bigtears::cry2:dunno:help:sosad
 
oh..thats a hard decision...both places sound great..i guess if i was in that situation i would probably choose to stay with my mom:dunno...

:hug2
 
Wow! That is tough. Would that be a different school district too? I've never been through this so I can't really say much, but I would probably base it on where my friends were, what school I wanted to go to, and what the area is like. That's if you can't choose between your parents just as they are. Don't let yourself be pressured with promises- your parents mean well but it makes it harder on you.
 
Its different states... Arizona or Texas (Dad or Mom). I have 1 friend in Arizona which I would be able to see often and I have about 3 friends here in Texas that I might get to go see and might not get to go see (we haven't moved yet so I dont know)
 
You really are being put on the spot trying to choose. Is their any adult teacher or counsellor at your school that you could go and talk to? Your parents are making you chose between them which isn't really the right way to do things particularly because you love them both and don't want to hurt one parents feelings. I wouldn't make a decision until I had someone other than my parents to help me out.
 
There are many things that you need to think about. Here are some questions I would ask myself:

Which parent is the better parent? A hard question, but you have to think about which parent would let you run off to parties and get drunk, as opposed to a more responsible parent who would rather you be home by 11. Which parent keeps a better house? Does one have a perpetually dirty living room? Think about your bunnies health!

You are 15, so you have a few more years of school left, and those years are tough. Will you be able to take care of a whole rabbitry when you're trying to study for finals and (Insert American equivolent of Provincials here)

How much do you enjoy riding horses? Are you going to miss it terribly if you move in with your dad? Will you have any time to think about horses with your rabbitry?


 
Just forget about rabbits and horses and friends and all of that stuff for a few minutes and think about which parent you feel more comfortable with or who you get along with better. I know you love them both - but who do you secretly like being around more? Which one do you have more in common with? It's okay;) You can admit it. We all have our favorite parent.
In the grand scheme of things, there are much more important things than material possessions, pets, and activities...these things we can live without. We can still find a way to be happy... to live a good life - but time with someone you like being with is not replaceable.
I HAVE SPOKEN
-SPITFIRE, 2006:wink:
 
I totally agree with Spitfire...

I grew up with seperated parents. They've been divorved since I was four. I would visit my dad every second week end, and for more extended periods in the summer. While I had a lot of fun at my dad's house, I found myself spending more time with my step-mother than I did with him. Even though I always told them that when I was old enough to chose who I wanted to live with, I would move in with them, I knew that I would never be happy living with my dad. He just wasn't a very good parent, horrible communication.

In my heart I knew that my mother was a better parent, more supportive, and a more structured life style. Even though I probably would have had more of a social life while living at my dad's, I don't think I would have turned out to be half the person I am now with out my mom there to help.

Best advice is to ignore the superficial things, and examine your relationships with each parent. Don't live with your dad if he's just going to buy you things, or with your mom if it's just what you are used to it. Think about school, friends, and family atmosphere.

Good luck, it's a tough choice to make.
--Dawn

*edit for very bad grammar...*
 
That'a tough question. I think you had good advice from all of the above who wrote in. Go with your gut feeling, but try not to choose by possesions like all the above said. In either case, I would hold off on the rabbitry until you are out on your own. You might not be able to leave when you wanted because you would need someone t take care of them, plus the expence if and when they get sick.

Since you already have rabbits, give them the love and attention they deserve, you could find yourself being overwhelmed with it all. Please let us know what you deicide and good luck! Tatum




 
I find it helpful to make a pros and cons list helpful when I have to make a difficult decision. Another idea is journaling, just write... you never know what might come out on paper or the computer. Remember no matter what happens both of your parents will love you. As far as a social life, you will meet new friends at school, no matter which place you decide on. I met and had my best friends at the barn; having horses in common just seems to bond people. The best part about that, is that the friends are people of all ages and backgrounds so if you are put ina situation similar to this one you would have an adult outside of the family to turn to. I know it was helpful for me. I also found horseback riding was a great stress reliever and a way to get away to think about things. Highschool takes up a lot of your time so having a rabbitry after graduation might be better for you, a choice only you can make. There are a lot of social groups and sport activities you could get involved in at school. Good luck!
 
Well, I my favorite parent is my father... He use to be a bad dad but I have always been a daddy's girl even when he disappoints me. (my mom would say all the time). I have a lot of fun with him and he is like my best friend (Wait, I cant tell him anything... He doesn't know I have been on my period for 4 yrs. or that I had my first boyfriend this year or anything) But I still LOVE him!!

Then there is my mom which is a great parent and I tell her everything but I dont seem to get along with her. We are to much like each other. She has a horrible temper, just like me. Both determined and strong. And I look EXACTLY like her in every way!! I hang up the phone on her and throw fits and she seems to love my sister way more than me... I seem to be the disappointment because I dont make straight A's like my sister or clean the house without being asked.



Then if I take other things into account there is the new schools. The one I will be attending here in TX would be small but growing and not that many people. Then the one in AZ will be very crowded with more of a crime rate and populated school district that is trying to grow but they have run out of room. The animals would be better off in Texas because it gets SO hot in AZ that there could be problems with heat stroke. And Horses are a huge part of my life. I am looking for a vet college that is going to have a riding program there or near there so I continue my riding. I love it!!

But staying with my mom means dealing with my Aunt or Sister who I hate!! My Aunt wants to kill me and my sister completly ignores me when she doesnt want to show me up!! At my dads place I have Gianna (my 4 yr old sister) and Hunter (9yr old brother) who I would have to take care of also. But they dont talk back because I am older. (more than one yr)... I am just so confused!!
 
Just concentrate on who you would enjoy being with more. Don't think about school or the weather. Those things can be overcome. Lots of people and horses lives in high temps.
Your happiness is the priority -:)
Maybe talk to your dad about riding lessons? I know what you mean about horses being a big part of your life. I've had a horse for 32 years of my 35, I just gave up my horse in December and I am completely lost!
But, I'm OKAY. I will live. For now. But I wouldn't be okay without the right kind of love and companionship from the right person.
 
Thanks for the help.. I just need to think about it some more I guess. I will continue to think about it and wait till my move (into Hutto) to decide if I like it there as well. I dont have a horse and ride school horses when I can but maybe someday I will be able to have one... Though my dad did buy me a horse he is being leased at a riding school in Scotsdale.
 
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