I wouldn't say you are "doomed"! But all buns are different and some are more socialble than others. It definately has to do with how they are brought up, but also their individual personalities. I had one baby here, that was born here, from a rescued mom. He was held from the time he was a little tiny baby, and snuggled, and socialized. His siblings are super friendly, playful... he attacks any person or rabbit that comes near him, and has caused me one or two serious injuries. This is rare mind you, out of all the rabbits I am guardian to, and all the buns I have fostered (a WHOLE lot) he is the only one that has been this cranky.
Can you hold them? You need them to get used to you holding them, make it a calm event, talk quietly, pet them, make them feel secure, and afterwards offer them a reward for good behavior, just like any other critter. Don't chase them or force them to come to you. You should try having them somewhere were they cannot run away from you, in a small room, or something, so they need to be near you and cannot take advantage and just take off. And the best advice I can give is TREATS work everytime. I've had buns that are 7 years old and have never been out of their cage a day in their life come to me, and they can quickly get turned around with treats. Don't just give them the treats, make them come to you to get them. Like put them in your hand, or even in your lap, or to start, just up right beside you, and quietly wait for your buns to come check out the goodies. It takes time but mostly patience, because you can feel pretty sad if they run from you or it seems like they don't want to be near you - but it's rarely because they don't like you. Don't give up - keep working at it, and give them a little nudge a long the way, like not giving them the opportunity to run off.
