What the heck? (rant/vent)

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Catlyn

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So i'm about to finish vocational real soon, the final exam being on friday.
I applied to an art vocational in a city far-far away, waiting on initial responses to that.
I got offered a seasonal job at a cafe in a village further away, a job with shifts that offers a short-term housing option. The work won't kill and the salary for it is decent too, considering my lack of experience in handling register-systems.
The night before yesterday (4th) we moved to our summer residence, allowing more space for buns. They, Iris in particular, decided to completely mess up the litterbox. For some reason the pee pad underneath was just in the way of her corner and she dug EVERYTHING away. I had to attend an important event in another city so i couldn't clean their box without missing the last bus to the other side where my contractor would be waiting to pick me up and drive to the cafe.
So i figured that dad would do it for me like he usually does when i go away for a few days and the box needs changing. He knew i had to go away. I explicitly told my household that.
I spent the 5th working in the cafe. In the evening, mum tried to call me but i couldn't understand a thing she wanted of me. She then wrote a text asking where the gas meds were. I was wondering why she would ask about them... I racked it up to mum being drunk again, shook it off, stayed the night and took the first bus to vocational in the morning.
I came home and saw a disaster. Or rather, i could smell it before even getting to the rabbit room.

Now everybody who has ever had a rabbit with an upset stomach knows what a putrid smell it is when they stomp on their uneaten cecotropes. How bad is the smell of a pee puddle that has stood there for half a day. How a pee puddle under the box stinks. I had that amplified by two.
My buns' area had three separate piles of ceco's and misformed soft cecals and two different puddles of stagnant pee.
I looked at the toilet and it was not cleaned AT ALL. Even hay wasn't topped. Iris had definetly gone even more ham on the corner and then turned her butt and peed in the empty spot.
The floor was littered with poops, uneaten ceco's and some misformed stools, and stray hays, under the tunnel and in the crevices of the floor. It seems that one puddle seeped underneath the floor. Now that's gonna stink for a good while.
20220606_163950.jpg20220606_165102.jpg
Tell me, have you seen worse from a situation that isn't a serious case of hoarding or just pure neglect?
The water was also super gross and full of suspicious bits of debris.
Storm was just a straight-up balloon. Not "bloat-ful"ly so, but "oww, gas"ful. He went all over the house escaping from the gas drops and wouldn't come to get the fresh hay in the clean box. Which he's never done before. He's sorta normal now but still.

While dad was oblivious to all of it.
What the heck?

I don't feel safe leaving my buns in mum's care when she's drunk, which for a few years now, happens literally every other week for a week straight. She doesn't know the words "no" and "limit", thus being unable to know when something's up with my dear ones.
I've come home to gas balloons way too much, i've tried to fight for them too much. It just scares the buns and mum remembers none of it. I've tried to "let it happen" and even out the negatives, but she does greater harm than what i can help recover.
Iris will just run away from me all the time, even if i want to per her, because i'm obligated to check her wellbeing after mum's madness.
She doesn't do anything for them except giving food. She won't change the box even when asked and explaied why i'm not able to, she's too afraid to hold buns while i clip nails or check bellies/teeth or comb loose fur, she won't even help with cleaning their enclosure from the greens' roots she scatters. I'd always end up being the vet tech substitute whom all pets hate. Of course the buns love mum more than me.

But i know that if i want to have an easier starting point in the other city while independently managing school, work, self-care, rent and all that, i'll have to save up. Rent for an individual, suitably spacious, pet-friendly apartment isn't cheap and i don't know if i would even make it out financially. I'm talking about 350€+utilities+electricity (anywhere from 20€ to 200€ depending on usage, apartment and season) at the lowest for a 20m2 studio-style apartment; when a full 160hr job's salary is usually only 650€ netto. And if with school i can work no more than half the hours... Without a full-job flatmate/partner or any other supporter, it'd be impossible.

This means that i'll be away half a week and there for the rest of it. I'm worried that the constant cycle of being there and then not, them being gassy and then not, will put too much strain on their health and our bond in general. I still remember Lümi's reactions when i came home from a lomg weekend away. If i'm not there half of the mornings, days and nights, i might just as well miss out on any subtle signs of health issues.
Unless i get the disruptive mum out of the picrure, the rabbits will see no chance of a peaceful life with a stable, proper diet.

I don't know how to move on.
What the heck.
 
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Sorry you are going through all this, I can only hope it will some how get better from here. Life can be a pain sometimes, don't let it get you down and just keep pushing forward. Hope you find a way to work it all out :)
 
I'm sorry things are so difficult for you in your life right now, and that you don't have parents you can rely on. I hope things start improving for you soon.
 

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