I'm going to be gone for a while.

Shop deals on ebay
Love your rabbit
shop deals on amazon
Advertise with us
Rabbits Online Forum

Help Support Rabbits Online Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
H

haxela

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 15, 2008
Messages
134
Reaction score
0
Location
Cleveland-area, Ohio, USA
This is going to be short since I'm having such a hard time. I've posted before about my eating disorders and other problems, well...I've relapsed and am being hospitalized tomorrow for at least two months. I've been struggling with eating enough and have lost too much weight too fast and am also dealing with really bad flashbacks of some bad times.

I'll be able to get online probably about once a week while I'm in the hospital. Maybe more, but I don't know. I'll try to check in when I can. My bunnies are being watched by my, "mother." She's the person I live with. And her daughter who I referred to this site now that she's getting back into rabbits. I'm even adopting out my Lennox to her so she can use and show her for 4h. But she's going to be helping with all the buns while I'm gone. I'm going to miss them and everyone so much.

I feel like I've failed everyone and everybun, but I need to go and get better now.

<3 Alexah
 
I am sorry that you are having problems. Wow 2 months, I really home you do get better. Your health is more important than anything righ tnow.

go and get better soon.
 
I'm sorry that you've been having troubles. We'll miss you and we'll be here when you get back, as will your bunnies, I'm sure.
 
Sending you major (((HUGS))), Alexah...:hug: Eating disorders can be such a tough thing to deal with, but I know you'll get through this. Post when you can...let us know how you're doing when you're up to it.

Take care of yourself, sweetie...

:pink iris:


 
Have you ever flown in a plane? Heard how the stewardesses/stewards give the talk before takeoff about what to do in case of emergency? Ever noticed how they say that if you're traveling with a child (or infant) and the oxygen mask drops down - to take a breath yourself and then help the child? (I think it goes something like that).

Sometimes you need to take care of yourself - before you can take care of others...

So go take care of yourself....we'll be here when you get back.

Good luck!

Peg
 
At the risk of being bizarre, you are very lucky, although it might not feel like it right now.

They must have caught you quicklyquick, you might be feeling awful, but your weight can't have relapsed to a critical weight (unless of course you were at a low weight anyway, in which case, it's great they were keeping an eye on you, even if you didn't want to tell them what was going on-which you said in your previous post, it's good they noticed), and that's a wonderful thing. Having said that, to act this quickly they must be very worried. I don't know how it works over there, but over here it takes almost death to get admitted. I say that knowing many things about EDs and weightloss as well as BMI, although not your specific situation. I do think, however, that you are lucky to get help you need.

How come 60 days minimum? I find that really interesting. Is it a section? Or is that just what they do for that specific program? 60 days is quite random and doesn't fit with any sections I am aware of. If it is a specific program, then I hope it is strucutred to the patient, and not just a strict and rigid program.

Do you know what they are going to do to help you? I.e. tube feed? Obs? Therapy?

For the flash backs, have you tried grounding? You are lucky they have admitted you for that too because that's very rare (from what I can gather, wherever in the world you are).

In the meantime, until they do whatever it is they are doing to help you deal with the flashbacks, maybe try grounding yourself. It is basically using your senses to keep you in the present.

~Take deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth, breathe in for the count of 4, hold for 2 and out for 5 (but counting slowly). This will stop you panicking.

~Think about all the things you can see, make a list (be that mentally, verbally,or actually written down, often a written down list can draw you back to the present easier), say them one by one, think about each of them, their texture, colour, where they are, etc.

~Think about what you can hear, and work through touch, taste, feel, as well, in the same detailed manner.

~Think about who you trust that is around you.

~Remind yourself of todays day, the date, the month, year.

~Tell yourself that you are safe and can not be hurt.

~If you can, look in a mirror, look at yourself now, at this age, remind yourself that you are safe, talk to yourself in the mirror.

~If appropriate hold something that grounds you, or that makes you feel safe, like maybe a little teddy, or stone, or keyring or something.

Keep doing it over and over and it will work, often doing it with someone can make it easier for you to focus on bringing yourself back to the present.

I know it sounds weird, but I do think you are lucky to have help, and to have people to look after your bunnies. I wish you well and hope IP helps.


(my font size went strange and massiveso I edited it not make it small)
 
I hope I'm not about to over step the mark here, so I apologise if I offend you, but I am very intrigued by what your diagnosis is?

I don't mean to pry or anything, but you said you nearly died from anorexia and bulimia. However, you can't have ana and mia at the same time because the criteria are very different. You can be a purging ana, or a type two mia, but not have them both. If you exhibit both behaviours but don't meet ana or mia criteria then that would be EDNOS, not both. If youhavea diagnosis of both, or did have the diagnosis of both at the same time, then you need to sort your doc out, because that is impossible and for true ana and mia diagnoses the behaviour needs to be there for 3 months plus, so a change from one to the other would not be swift.

Your doc needs a good kick if that's what s/he said.


Edited because I can't type.
 
You haven't failed anyone Alexah - you have relapsed into an illness that you are fighting to overcome.

We are praying for you!

Pam
 
I'm so sorry to hear this- we'll all miss you very much here.

Get well soon, I'll be thinking of you! And your buns will miss you very much as well I'm sure, but you're doing the right thing in taking care of yourself and trying to get this sorted once and for all.

I wish you the very best of luck :hug:

Jen xx

:bestwishes:
 
I'm not Lexi, but I am her little "sister." Thanks to everyone for caring enough to send such warm comments.

She got to the hospital alright. She got on the plane this morning and we heard from her once she got to Oklahoma. She's now at the hospital and has been admitted. I'm actually having a hard time with all this, but whatever.

I don't know enough about everything to really answer the questions that were asked. But I do know she went willingly into the hospital and the program said she'd be there at least for 2 months. If I find anything else out, I'll surely let everyone know.
 
Samantha wrote:
I'm not Lexi, but I am her little "sister." Thanks to everyone for caring enough to send such warm comments.

She got to the hospital alright. She got on the plane this morning and we heard from her once she got to Oklahoma. She's now at the hospital and has been admitted. I'm actually having a hard time with all this, but whatever.

I don't know enough about everything to really answer the questions that were asked. But I do know she went willingly into the hospital and the program said she'd be there at least for 2 months. If I find anything else out, I'll surely let everyone know.
Click to expand...
Let her know we miss her the next time you talk to her! I hope she'll get better and I'll be keeping her in my thoughts.
 
get well soon... and you didn't let us down... you and your family...will be in my thoughts and prayers... Just get better thats all that matters.. sending hugs your way
 
I know I don't recall the story correctly, but it was something someone once gave to me and the moral of it stuck. I will try to relate it as close as possible.

I am walking down the road, there is a hole that I do not see, I fall into it.
I am walking down the road, there is a hole I do see, I fall into it.
I climb out of the hole and continue walking,
there is a hole I do see, I fall into it.

I am walking down the road, there is a hole I see, I walk around it.


I have struggled a lot in my life with my own issues...and though I don't know yours, I wish you well on your journey and believe we all will have the chance to see the hole, and all will one day simply walk around it.
 
Tell her that we miss her and will be thinking of her and hoping she gets well!! Please give her bunnies hugs from us, too. This must be so difficult for her.
 
You've failed no one, it takes a TON of strength to admit you have an issue and get the help.

Hang in there, I hope you get better soon.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Latest posts

Back
Top