Feeling stomped on.

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TCRabbitry

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Jul 4, 2009
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Location
Salem, Oregon, USA
so, things have been crazy lately.

Back in August, I moved my rabbits down to my friends house. I told her time and time again that I could never thank her enough for allowing me to do so. I even gave her over half of my herd to sell or keep.

They were down there for a little over 4 months. After I gave her over half of my herd, she only had 7 of my animals to take care of. The rest were hers.

I had originally said that I would help pay for feed and what not, but there was no real numbers talked about. I knew that it took $50 to buy everything for all of my animals. That was feed, hay, and shavings.

She kept asking, almost every week for more money, even after I had sent almost $100... so finally, I approached her and said that I wouldn't pay more than $100, because I knew it only took me $50 to take care of all of my animals. So, I told her that I would send her $100 a month to care for my animals, because I appreciated all that she was doing. Now, I was also going down every couple of weeks or so and cleaning my animals cages. And, my animals weren't in her cages, they weren't taking up any of her cage space. I brought my cages down for them to go in.

Now, this last month, being December and being that I was moving, and had to quit my job, I didn't have too much money. So, I sent her what I could. $50 total. When I had talked to her about sending her part of the $50, I had a final notice put on my door for my water bill, and had to go down to the office before 5 and pay it, so I couldn't send it to her. I explained all of this to her, and told her that I was getting paid again in the next day or so, and would send it to her then.

Then, I got this nasty e mail, saying that her husband was all upset, because I hadn't sent the full $100 and that I had to come get my rabbits.

I was so upset by this, that my fiance and I went to go pick up the rabbits that same day.

Mind you, while all of this was going on, my fiance and I had offered to sell them a car. For half of what we would have asked anyone else. They took the car, and said that they would send us some money on it every other week. Being as they were supposed to be good friends, and really needed the car, we accepted the deal. Well, the first two weeks went by, and we never got any money. Then the next two weeks... and so on... they had the car for 4 months and never paid a dime on it.

After I went and got my rabbits, she started to post things around, about how just because another breeders for sale listing were going to look similar to hers (because she was listing my animals), she was by no means associated with them.

That really upset me, so I wrote her an e mail. I put into it everything that I had been keeping bottled up. I wanted to put some other things in it, but I didn't.

So, I get a call later that evening, after I had sent her this e mail. Where she tells me how horridly I had hurt her and how she doesn't want to deal with me anymore, where the rabbits are concerned. Then proceeded to tell me that I could have my rabbits back, that she still has like 5. I told her that I couldn't really take all of them, but that if I did get them back, I would really like my one buck.

Then, I emailed her later to tell her that I thought about it, and would like a couple of them back. She then e mailed me to tell me that it wasn't a choose a few and leave her with the culls deal, it was all or none. So I told her that I would expect to get all of them back at the next show.

She then e mails me to let me know that I can't have them back, and that she is blocking me, so there can be no more contact, and to give her space at the show....

Well, I really feel jipped in all of this... I had spent a lot of money on the two rabbits that I was trying to get back.... And, I feel really taken advantage of. I figured it out, and her feed bill, just for the rabbits, is $200 a month. I was sending her $100 a month, so she was getting half her feed bill paid by me. I have had my rabbits back for almost two weeks, I went out and spent $20 on shavings and feed for them so far, and know that it will last them til the end of the month, if not longer.

All of this makes me really not want to show at Oregon shows anymore. It doesn't make me want to sell out by any means, because my animals are my sanity... But, it makes me not want to be at shows where she may show up.

As far as I am concerned, it seems like I was just a meal ticket for her rabbits, and for getting a car, when she had none.... and I am hurt that it was like that... I know that it will take time, and hurt for a while, but I think in the long run I will be better off... especially if one is willing to throw out a 7 year friendship over money and rabbits.

Anywho... I really just needed to vent... Thanks for reading this... :D Melinda
 
WOW what a story u have. But the one thing I wanted to comment on was that dont let her "win" u b the better person and go to those shows it will get her goat if u show up and it will make her uncomfortable if you act like the nice guy and smile and wave at her if u see her there...Kill 'em with kindness even if u r hurting
 
wow i would be so mad.

so did they ever pay anything with the car? i learned the hard way to get things in writting with a signiture.

i dont even know what to say ): except i have been in a simliar situation with someone living with me and me paying all their bills...where i never saw the money they owed me...so i understand how used you might feel.

its hard to trust people or be nice after something like this happens
 
Nope, they never paid one red cent on the car... and they had it for 4 months. We went and picked it up the weekend before we went and picked up the rabbits and all my cages.

She is going around asking everyone what she should have asked for long term boarding... everyone is saying $1.00 a day... but all she did was feed and water them. She never cleaned their cages.... or did anything too labor intensive... as a matter of fact, she bred my animals with out my permission, and didn't tell me... it wasn't until I found out a doe that hadn't been bred in 8 months all of a sudden had VD that I even suspected anything...

I had three does or so that were bred when the rabbits were brought down... 2 of them had dead litters, and one had a live litter. I didn't find any of this out until I came down to clean cages... and I wasn't told by her either, I found the babies in the nest box, with the live litter...

As a matter of fact, I cleaned over half her cages as well as all of mine....

Nuts to say, I am done with dealing with this person. I actually sold out of most of the breed that I was working with, and have gotten a good start in a new breed.

I am extremely mad..... I am doing my best to keep my emotions in check too... When I told her that my fiance was tired of seeing me upset and crying, I was told that was BS. That if he cared, HE would have said something. My fiance is a very sweet, soft spoken man. He has never been one to be aggressive, or get mad easily. And, he knew that it was my friend, and I needed to deal with it.

Anywho... I will stop ranting now...
 
hopefully she doesnt begin ruining your reputation with other breeders at show...

im glad you got your car back, at least you didnt loose that

its to bad you cant do anything legal about the fact she bred your animals, putting them in danger without you knowing.

rant as needed. we ALL need it.
and i can understand his understanding of not wanting to string out the situation further...i am soft spoken myself and avoid conflict as i can.

its good that youve dropped this woman as a "friend" and not strung out the uneeded stress. with the new stock you have a new start :)
 

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