Dealing with mental instability

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sugarbunnies

sugarbunnies

Well-Known Member
Joined
Oct 17, 2012
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Oceanside, California, USA
I'm new to the forum so I feel a little weird about ranting, but here goes...

I struggle with Bi-polar disorder/depression, and this week has been another rollercoaster. I have finally found a new psychiatrist that is great with me but she said she was resigning. I am starting new meds, and hopefully, these will work. I admit I turned to medical marijuana and it worked great but my mom is very against it. It is so crippling to deal with this when you are only 18. I also deal with paranoia (Being afraid of my mom going out alone, worrying to the point I can't sleep if my parents go on a flight, etc).

What is frustrating is that my dad doesn't understand it or doesn't really want to. My mom is my only solace because she has it and so does her whole line of women in her family. My best friend doesn't understand it either.

To be honest, I got my bunnies as a comfort, and even though Fenrir seems to be one of those bunnies who do not enjoy being around people, it still does me a great uplight. It makes me feel great caring for bunnies that were lost in a shelter, when I can't seem to take care of myself. Their joy at being in a home that appreciates them transfers to me.

Thanks for reading...
 
Glad to hear that your rabbits provide a positive focus for you.

Hopefully, your support team will be able to recommend a psychiatric professional with similar skills to the one you have. It may be worth asking the outgoing Dr. if she can recommend you to someone with a similar treatment strategy.

There are also a number of mental health forums online that can be very supportive, and offer positive discussion.

Good vibes to you :hug:
 
out of curiosity, what meds are you on? I've been through a lot of them and was recently put on a low dose of abilify... it's freaking magical. only thing that ever really made a difference (not counting annoying side-effects, like anti-depressants that make me manic).

I also find the bunnies are a great comfort, as is having a friend that's bi-polar - it's the sort of thing where you just don't "get" it unless you actually have it. it helps SO much to have someone who understands what you're going through. I, too, take better care of my bunnies than I do of myself and it makes me happy to make them happy.
 
I am on Lamictal and Celexa. My psychiatrist seems to think that Celexa might be making matters worse. I am on 40mg, the highest can go. Coincidentally, lol, the psych actually prescribed me abilify!
 
iirc, lamictal didn't do much of anything for me... celexa caused hypomania on its own (was also taking 40 mg), but I've actually been combining it with the abilify recently with decent results - it seems to cancel out the side effects.

the abilify stopped working as well after a bit, and I tried upping the dose, which didn't help at all. had an appointment the other day and my psych actually recommended *lowering* the dose - apparently less is often more for some reason. crossing my fingers it goes back to working the way it did in the beginning, because my god was it great to feel NORMAL for the first time since my early to mid teens.

I actually gave up on meds when I was about your age because nothing worked. stuff either made me manic or seemed like it was working... until it turned out it didn't (because of the "normal" phases that can occur with being bi-polar). it was only about a year ago (I'm 28 now) that I decided I needed to get my life together and needed meds to do that, so I gave it another try... right when I was getting discouraged again, I got put on the abilify.

out of curiosity, are you type 1 (manic more often) or type 2 (depressed more often)? I've got type 2.
 
I am type 2. When I get depressed, I get REALLY depressed. But then again, when I get happy, I "bounce off of the walls". A week ago I really felt like stopping my meds... and as mentioned before, medical marijuana worked better than any pills. My last psychiatrist was unwilling to try different meds so I definitely left her after a while.

Yeah, so we're not sure which is not doing it for me: lamtical, or celexa. We're redusing the dosage of the celexa and going up in lamictal.
 
I've only recently started seeing someone, because I was not coping with the real world. I have depression, and an anxiety disorder, but after my last session, I got started on a bipolar medication, which is interesting. I wonder what he's thinking. I haven't been on any of the stuff you've mentioned though, so can't help there.

Anyway, I know how you feel; I'm 19, and its...horrible sometimes to know this is always what it'll be. Just barely surviving. I'll never be better, it'll just be controlled. And there's a limit to how much you can control. Most of my family have mental illness too, but my dad doesn't understand either.
 
Mental instability can be so tough to deal with!
Every year, I go through a few months where I just cannot live my life, I let myself go completely and practically eat myself into a coma. It's weird because it really switches up. I've started to think I have a disorder I just don't know to what extent.

I was really off last year, I felt so pressured, I quit my job because the stress was making me feel like I was in a neck brace I could not move properly. I went to the doctor and she prescribed me Zoloft. It's kind of funny because I am an extremely rational person, I went to a few psychologists who have all actually agreed with my thoughts and feelings regarding family life and my career etc. Sometimes I think that it was actually just my surroundings that are making me go nuts!

Needless to say I only took the Zoloft for 4 months because I just felt so monotone, not happy, not sad, just content with the way things were. I did not like it, it causes me issues sometimes but I love to feel emotion, I'm so used to it it just feels like home.

Bunnies help deal with it a lot! Just knowing that they can listen and they're always just there!!
 
I have suffered with extreme anxiety (I've had panic attacks during which I have hurt myself by hitting/dropping to the ground/etc. because I literally cannot control myself) and depression that comes and goes (but not bipolar disorder.) I do the opposite of eating, I STOP eating when I'm going through a time of being depressed. Once I lost 11 lbs. I've never been on medication but sometimes I wonder if I should be. I just don't want it to mess with the times when I'm okay, you know? Bunnies are the best medicine. Anyways, I'm glad you said it here, because it's good to know you're not alone. :)
 
sugarbunnies wrote:
The only other option she thinks is Lithium. However, Lithium sounds like it has a TON of side effects...
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I take lithium!!!! I don't notice anything....only thing is that you have to push the liquids!!!!!!!!! I am 13....and I have gone through this too! Don't worry! we are here for you!:wink



 
I'm 29 and dealing with another bout of depression... what I find frustrating is that the medication that has worked before doesn't seem to be doing much this time and am going to see about upping the dose as I'm pretty much on the minimum (50mg Prothiaden) and when I was first diagnosed in '06 I was on 125mg of it.

What also annoys me is that when 95% of people see me I'm feeling OK and therefore don't look depressed at all and say to me "Well you don't look depressed!" Yeah I'm not at the moment cause I put on the brave face. Having my bunny Ash pass away almost two weeks ago doesn't help matters and right now I'm in a down spiral, so sometimes it shows. What is really getting me is the lack of motivation that I'm going through, sometimes I feel like I can't even be bothered getting out of my pyjamas or don't feel like doing the housework... I'll still feed my pets, play with them and give them cuddles but it might take me a bit longer to clean out litters or clean other things.

I still think only those who have been there know what you're going through, bit like a male doctor telling us women "Oh period pain isn't that bad"
 
Oh yes, I do agree... It's just those off days that no one sees except for maybe close family that are hard to deal with! I feel like it's a come and go thing. And oh yes, no male does know the extent of period pain.... some days I feel like someone is ripping out my insides! :/
 
Ooh, our whole family is full of crazies. My mom has depression/paranoia/OCD, my dad has OCD(and my mom has always sworn add, even though all tests are far from positive), my oldest brother has depression, my other brother has anxiety and paranoia, and I have OCD, anxiety, paranoia, and whatever that weather related depression is.

Jeepers, that's just my immediate family, and doesn't count step-family either. (my stepbrother is severely autistic) Life is never boring. My dad is running for political stuff, and somebody had the audacity to say that he hated people with mental illnesses.

Animals really do help though. I have huge issues with taking pills, especially the big antibiotics, so I had to take them once, and my dog sat next to me on the couch as I took them, then licked me and cuddled with me when I was done. :)

I was on a generic Prozac forever, but it only ever took the edge off, but higher doses made me not able to comprehend anything, so now I'm about to try Zoloft.
 
Toady wrote:
What also annoys me is that when 95% of people see me I'm feeling OK and therefore don't look depressed at all and say to me "Well you don't look depressed!" Yeah I'm not at the moment cause I put on the brave face. Having my bunny Ash pass away almost two weeks ago doesn't help matters and right now I'm in a down spiral, so sometimes it shows. What is really getting me is the lack of motivation that I'm going through, sometimes I feel like I can't even be bothered getting out of my pyjamas or don't feel like doing the housework... I'll still feed my pets, play with them and give them cuddles but it might take me a bit longer to clean out litters or clean other things.

I still think only those who have been there know what you're going through, bit like a male doctor telling us women "Oh period pain isn't that bad"
Click to expand...

Ah the invisible illness card. I also have a thing called POTS, which is a heart condition just as debilitating as congestive heart failure, but everyone says "but you don't look sick! You're making it up!"
 
Or that whole nonsense "well just be happy" Like that f-ing works. It doesn't make sense to people that don't get depression that some times you can't be happy no matter what positive attitude you try. Some times it just doesn't make any sense why you are down you just are.

Depression and panic attacks here. My panic attacks usually aren't too bad aside from a few here and there.
 
lauratunes12 wrote:
Ah the invisible illness card. I also have a thing called POTS, which is a heart condition just as debilitating as congestive heart failure, but everyone says "but you don't look sick! You're making it up!"
Click to expand...

Yep, my mother has a lung condition and it leaves her out of breath even after the simple things like walking or shopping. So many people look at her like she's got nothing wrong, until they see her puffing and having to take a break.

And holtzchick I know what you're going through, I'm on the depo injection cause once a month it feels like someone's stabbing my abdomen for 24-48 hours on end... but because I'm under 30 with no kids they won't let me get it all removed because "I'll change my mind" about not wanting kids... I have 6 kids; 4 cats, a dog and a bunny!
 
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