Briar and her hatred of me

[Rayen]

Okay, so maybe hatred is a little strong. But it's been bothering me for a few months and I had hoped it would get better but it never really has so here's my question.

When I first got Briar she loved me. I would pet her and she would sit beside me forever and ever to get more pets. She never liked being picked up, which was fine by me and I didn't pick her up more than necessary. Quinn came along and she was still fine, still loved getting attention. When she became a big teen bun she would try to tell me she loved me all the time by circling me and rubbing her scent all over me. She would 'groom' my pants and hair and fingers.

Then I got her spayed.

Her spay did not go well. First I had to give her the pain medication which was fine, she liked it, but I would poke around in her cage two-three times a day more than normal which was not so fine. Then she ripped her stitches out and two days after her spay we had to go to the vet (an hour away). They glued it shut and gave me more medication. So now I had to go into her cage to give her more medication that she hated and so I had to fight with her. Then she managed to get the glue off (she had been wearing a bunny-cone) and we had to go to the vet again. Then she stopped eating, so I had to take her to the vet again.

Anyway, short version: I had to pick her up way too often when she wasn't feeling well and had to stuff medication she hated down her throat for nearly two weeks.

Now I can just barely pet her and she'll run when I come near her. I've tried doing the same thing I did when I first got them, lying on the floor letting her smell me and lick me, etc. I don't pick her up unless I have to (nail clippings and quick checks). I sit on the floor with my laptop, or read a book and she'll come smell me and lick at me still but if I go to pet her or touch her she runs.

Will she ever like me again? Or is this it? She's been spayed for about 3-4 months now, I was kind of hoping it would at least start to get slightly better by now.

 

[Flashy]

Through no fault of your own, you have lost her trust, big time. That's not your fault and you can clearly see why it happened, but it's just a horrible turn after stressful circumstances.

I think its a case of going right back to basics, but earlier basics than when she first came to you.

Not sure if you've read it, but this is the Bonding with your Bunyn article. http://www.rabbitsonline.net/view_topic.php?id=33995&forum_id=17

I think you need to completely ignore her when she is around you. don't try to pet her, or anything at all, just ignore her and let her build up her confidence in being around you again. After she has built up that confidence you can start to talk to her, but still don't try and reach out to her or anything.

Once she is confident around you your biggest tool will be her favourite food, you can try having it on your lap for her to come and get, or near you, and you need to gradually progress to being able to handfeed her. That may take a while, but that is probably the direction in which you want to head.

From there, when handfeeding her, try also having your other hand open upwards near her, and gradually move it towards her. and work towards being able to stroke her when she eats.

Each time you have to pick her up, for nail clipping and things, you will probably find you go back a step or two, but just keep doing your best and be patient. This is one of those situations that happens so commonly and so easily, yet is hard to beat, but it can be done.

Good luck.

 

[Rayen]

I can hand feed her and she'll come up to see what I'm doing, it's not so bad that she entirely avoids me whenever possible, it's just whenever I go to pet her or make a sudden movement she bolts away. I don't really go out of my way to pet her, I'll try every so often when she comes up to me. She often runs off to the opposite side of the room where I usually have the storage bin with their hay/litter to hide.

Then as soon as I grab anything with a rattly bag sound she's literally in my lap attacking said bag. I can usually give her a quick ear rub when she's eating something, but as soon as it's done she's gone.

 

[Flashy]

Just be patient. She has had a trauma and has no idea why, hopefully with time and patience she will come round, but if she doesn't, just maybe accept that she is happy as she is and is just a bun you can't stroke, but she can be comfortable around you on her own terms.

 

[jamesedwardwaller]

they are prey animals,,what would you do different??..if you could??-probably nothing,,did what you had to,,same here,,- prey animals are reactioary you will have to do alot of bun kissing,,and don,t be upset with yoursef if after a time it looks permanent,.i have a different spiecies of rabbit (cottontail),he has always been finicky,,perskicky-hard to deal with,,if he wants lovin i am always here for him and he knows it,and it suprises me when he kisses my nose and bites my toes/he has calmed down considerably-there was a time for-(my) blood letting for no reason other than-(his)being mean,,worth his weight in gold-all 2.5 pounds,,cottontails in the wild live less than 1.5 years,,he (jojobeez) is over 3 years old/easter baby...i guess i tell you this soas not to be the pursuer(predatory)--work with what the rabbit will allow you to do,,that should work best for both,..sincerely james waller