Argh what to do what to do.

[PepnFluff]

Well i'm not sure if any one remembers but last christmas I was stumped for a chrissie present for a BTL (bitter twisted lady) aka my Grandads partner. If you don't http://www.rabbitsonline.net/view_topic.php?id=41861&forum_id=5&page=1. Basically shes a narcissistic horrible lady. Anyway to get to the point she's gotten worse, and not to be rude to the BTL we seriously think she has a mental disorder. Shes begun having tantrums towards grandad and is rude toher friends and my Grandads beggining to suffer, and I hate to see him like this.

It was Grandads 70th birthday just over a month ago and all his daughters put in money and got him and Maree (BTL)flights and accomodation to go to Wellington to watch an All Blacks test match. We gave him the gift when Maree wasn't there and he was so chuffed and excited about going, anyway Gdad called us all about 1 week later saying it was such a lovely gesture but he couldn't go. And when we asked why he had no reason, I find out today that Maree had actually thrown a tantrum and screamed at him and called him degrading names and made him feel horrible about being gifted this. We managed to talk Grandad into going but when he had lunch with my Aunty in Welly Kirsty said he seemed very down and he's been like this ever since.

My god this is a long ramble, sorry. Anyway, as grandads very down at the moment and were his only family in Nelson I thought I should go to the effort and try and boost his mood and his confidence again, but I'm not sure how........As Maree takes offence to A LOT of things, I'm not sure wether or not I should go and let Gdad be happy for a wee while but then have Maree cut into him after I'm gone about how we constantly use him or to leave it so it gives her no extra reasons to be angry......Also how do you go about getting someone a psych evaluation? She will never ever admit she has something wrong but she does, and sheneed's help before she wears Gdad down even more........Sorry for the rant guys but my Gdads a very special man to me and I hate seeing him like this.

 

[kirsterz09]

I feel so sorry for your grandad, I know how hard it is, my mum is very simular and throws tantrums alot! I don't really know what to suggest, you see I was thinking of something they could both do together and enjoy doing together, as it seems that if it is only something that your grandad would like to do then she seems to put a stop to it, so is there anything that they both like that, you could arrange for him?
Does she ruin any gifts that you just give him i.e. like at christmas if you get him a special gift and she just gets something normal so to speak, does she get all upset and throw tantrums about that too? So that you struggle to just get a gift for him?

 

[PepnFluff]

The thing is she'd been talking on the phone to my Aunty when she called and she said that she thought the Rugby trip was a great idea and how thankful she was that she could go to, thats one of the reasons why we suspect she may have a mental illness as she is so up and down. No I don't really struggle for gifts for him but thats only cause she doesn't want to spend christmas with us as my Grandma (his ex wife) is there. So she really has no grounds to complain on, she has asked my whole family not to buy her gifts and when I did buy her and EXPENSIVE palm tree the next day it was in the rubbish bin. I think I will just pop around when shes not home and have a drink with him and try and cheer him up

 

[kirsterz09]

yeah that would be nice for him. My mum is somewhat simular she experiances insane mood swings too.
It sounds like she could be bipolar or schizophrenic but like you said she has to see it in herself before you can commence treatment.

 

[PepnFluff]

Thanks very much Kirsty I appreciate it heaps Yeah thats what I suggested to Mum as her mood swings can't just be put down to PMS haha.